When the Benedict Cumberbatch-starrer Sherlock came out what seems like ages ago, I might have gone batshit crazy. I always loved Sherlock, but this modern spin on Doyle’s delectably sharp detective was a class apart. His deduction methods applied to everyday modern objects, making the show relatable.

I remember seeing a clip where Sherlock explained to Watson the intricate differences between the phones of a drunk man vs a sober one. He pointed, very astutely, deriving from scuff marks around the power connection of Watson’s expensive phone, that the previous owner of his used phone had a drinking problem. All that just from an apparent quick glimpse of the phone! After an obvious ‘Whoa, that’s insane!’ and a few other expletives, an image flashed in my mind.
The image of a USB stick (aka USB flash drive).
Now, the logical question would be, what has a USB stick got to do with all this?
Attention deficit disorder aside, ‘pretty much everything’.
If Sherlock were to look at the USB port of any of my laptops – previously owned or current, he would find those scratch marks in all of them. I am not kidding!
And this is not because I have a drinking problem (which alcoholic ever says they have one, though? Hmmm….)
This is simply because either the USB port on my laptop or my USB stick or both are objects of way higher intelligence than me. They are dynamic in their thinking. Way more dynamic than me.
They know to make sure that my first attempt at plugging in the USB stick is always a failure.
How difficult is it, plugging a USB stick, really?

I underestimated the complexity of the task, my stupidity, or both. I kid you not, I haven’t yet, in decades of using a computer, ever plugged in a USB stick right the first time. I secretly think the sides flip inside, anticipating my moves. Just to mess with me.
Computer: Here comes the USB stick
After a thorough analysis peeking into the port for 4 full seconds and then another 4 seconds of broody scientific analysis at the USB stick’s USB connector
Me: Yup, I am sure this side up is right.
Computer: Incoming! Activate the connect flip.
Me: Dayum
Call it One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.
Call it the Rise of Machines.