Why “Are You a Human” Tests Frustrate Us So Damn Much!

a funny meme about captcha

Oh, the joys of machines! ‘Intelligent’ machines! They certainly make our lives easy, don’t they? Be it work, pleasure or just cat memes, where would we be if there were no machines in the world!

However, the machine that I like the most also gives me the most grief.

Yes! The PC, what else!

I must admit, though, it has pissed me off way more times than it has pleased me in the last decade. I don’t exaggerate when I say that I can barely make heads or tails of this artificial intelligence business. I almost always hear it with accompanied imagery of a dystopian world.

I can’t say I don’t see the value; because I do. (Bordering on) Flawless translation algorithm(s), autocomplete(d) sentences, improved grammar suggestions, you name it. It has saved me time, lots of it.

But now it has also started taking my time on stupid things. A lot of time.

Gone are the days when a simple numeric code or voice message was enough to authenticate that you were a human. 

Oh, how time flies! Now I am asked to prove that I am a human being way more than I like. The more profound existential question aside, I am a human. 

But so many of these failed authentications during the day make me question my assumption.

Machine: Tell us you are a human

Me: How?

Machine: What? You are so stupid! I will give you many meaningful pictures and ask you to identify random stuff. Stuff that any human being with average ‘intelligence’ can quickly identify.

Me: Oh yes? Like what?

Machine: Simple things like identifying traffic signals, I will give you pictures with traffic lights, some way more zoomed than others, and some that you can barely even see without a microscope. You are a human being; you invented me, you can figure it out, can’t you?

Me: Umm…

Machine: Well, if you can tell me the difference between stairs outside a building or a zebra crossing from 9 miles away, you are a human, of course!

Me: Yeah, that doesn’t seem half bad; why don’t you try that one with me next time?

Machine: Yes, sure if you say so.

–la la la la la la…..

anyrandomwebsite.com: Thou shalt not pass without proving you are a human.

Me: Sure, show me what you got!

After 1200 pictures and eight failed attempts to log in.

Me: My friends were right all along. I am an alien!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s