On one of my random internet surfing days, I came across this meme:
Now if you are like me, you did smile looking at it, didn’t you?
What you might not have done is put up a mental roster of people that you hate enough to say this.
I am no angel but I couldn’t think of any person I would actually do that to.
Although, there are a few that come quite close.
Jokes aside, I am sure we all have someone that we do not particularly like or find disagreeable, but some people take it to the next level. They’ll say nasty things about others behind their backs.
And sometimes, these people may not necessarily be on your “I-don’t-like-these-people” list. They may be people whom you considered friends.
Some of us confront people whom we don’t like and even clear the air. This is a relatively rare occurrence as both parties have to be patient and have an open mind.
A more common manifestation is hurt and a gnawing feeling to seek revenge. Instead of clearing the air, people try to get back at them by saying things behind their backs too.
Unless you have complete control over your emotions – you are NEVER going to be indifferent to people saying bad things about you behind your back.
Like any other human response to an unpleasant situation – you are either going to fight, after all, you love yourself and have to defend yourself to save your honor.
Or, you may choose to flee (ah, f**k this shit!)
Sometimes, choosing one of these responses can make things better. But more often than not, they don’t.
Here is when Epictetus comes to rescue.
“If anyone tells you that a certain person speaks ill of you, do not make excuses about what is said of you but answer, “He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone.”
Your first reaction to reading this could be:
“Wow, this guy is smart”
“What a load of c**p, I would rather show them their place.”
Regardless of the category you belong to, I strongly recommend trying this when someone badmouths you. It works like a charm.
Epictetus never ever fails to deliver when it comes to practical advice.
Get ready for your next mic drop moment, thanks to him.